Internet relationships

[Ava]

What's it take to make a relationship work over the internet, as opposed to in person?

Are internet relationships more likely to fall apart, because they are largely based on Mercury synastry, and Mercury moves fast?

Aren't in-person vibes (sun/moon) more important?

What do you think?

[Deleted]

My thought is Venus (shared interests that create the bond - music, movies, any kind of media really), Mercury (thoughts, writing style, intuition vs. senors, genre of forums one would be into) and Neptune (using your imagination to fill in the blanks in order to imitate the physical proximity of a relationship in real time). Maybe even Uranus too since it rules electronics/the unconventional?

I personally am not the type to go for internet relationships - I should probably refresh myself on my Pullen chart to see why that is

[Deleted]

Hmmm well my strongest sign is Capricorn according to Mr. Pullen (at 17.5%) and Saturn is my 3rd strongest planet (11.1%) so I'm going to chalk it up to that. "Do you even really know me? Do I even really know you? How can we make this tangible and work in the real world?" a very cardinal train of thought. Probably not a coincidence that my chart is mostly cardinal (44%) as this flavor wants to pick up the speed, start things, forge roots, make the ineffable something solid.

[Deleted]

Hey @astrokeen, I just went on astro.com, clicked on the "Pullen/Astrology" tab and then scrolled down to the last option in the click-down menu, which is "simple chart delineation"

Then when you get to the page with a lot of text, scroll down until you get a list of your planets in a spreadsheet-like format with titles such as "power/ranking" etc

[Deleted]

Ok, Thanks athena .

[lumina]

athena

I am the same as you I think. Internet relationships are not "real" relationships in my feeling, though I need to make a distinction. If the relationship is mostly based on sharing thoughts, on a mental level, like most friendships are, then I would definitely consider them "real". However if we are talking about an intimate relationship (romantic or sexual), then I think an important ingredient is missing and you will have to be in physical contact to see if that really is a relationship that could stand the test of time.

Even in friendships I Noticed that if I meet people, after having conversed them for years without ever meeting them, there is a moment that feels like a "physical shock" almost, like a modification or something.

This is not happening if I meet a person first on the physical level, even if it is just a short "Hello", then it does not seem to make much of a difference if most of the communication is being made online; it depends however WHAT kind of relationship this is. There are some that require actual caring for each other in practical ways, and that is something that can never be done online.


I am not really too charmed by PUllen (though not too dis-charmed either), but just for the record, in my delineation it sais:

Jupiter 14,8
Venus 10,7
Mercury 10,3
Mars 10,3
Neptune 10,3

Considering the strong Jupiter-Neptune theme (and it is strong as Neptune is angular, they are in mutual reception and squaring each other, so I agree with PUllen on that. lol), I should be much more un-discriminating when it comes to relationships (internet, real life - well the internet is part of the real life of course, but it comes with certain specialities).



strongest mode is mutable: 46,2%

strongest signs:
Sag 22,1%
Pisces 14,7%
Aries 13,2% (this comes from the 1st house emphasis, and I would be inclined to debate PUllen on this According to my observation and against my previous thoughts the houseplacements does not really seem to be that colouring of the character traits - so the equation 1st house = Aries-traits, does not really seem to fit.)

[12YearsABlob]

Jul 16, 2018 0:37:55 GMT Ava said:

What's it take to make a relationship work over the internet, as opposed to in person?

Umm...webcams? Jk, jk... #BaadBlob

Jul 16, 2018 0:37:55 GMT Ava said:

Are internet relationships more likely to fall apart, because they are largely based on Mercury synastry, and Mercury moves fast?

Hmm.. Well, I do think other things play into it - especially Uranus and Neptune. Some people have a style of relating that thrives on the other person being far away, not part of their daily life in some way. Venus-Uranus types, perhaps? Or some kind of attachment style conducive to that.

Also - 1.) Do you mean they never ever meet in person?
2.) Meet rarely?
3.) Have met once but never again?
etc.

If someone has a slightly more detached relating style, they might be able to handle a long-distance relationship if they meet every now & then.

To make a very hand-wavy generalization, 'entirely online' relationships might not cut it for earth signs or earth-heavy people.

[Ava]

Hi there 12YearsABlob,

hehehe webcams Gosh I have never done that...never face timed, never Skyped. It's off my radar, I don't think of it. But yeah, that might help!

I was thinking of people who meet online, talk for a while, it turns romantic, then meet in person, then maybe go back to their respective homes far away from each other...that sorta relationship.

But then I was also thinking of everything under the sun including platonic friendships.

Maybe Saturn is the clincher for online relationships to last, just like in person. But I think both people have to be thoughtful or cerebral enough to make discussion the mainstay of the relationship. Both people have to enjoy online communication for its own sake, before they connect. A lot of men seem to dislike being "committed" to anything or anyone online.

"To make a very hand-wavy generalization"....

[FruityLlama]

This thread made me think of the first 46 seconds of this haha

And yes lets have a party!

One of my friends had such a relationship for a while, they were at opposite ends of the country for university and met only at holidays and maybe some weekend trips. She has moon conjunct neptune exact in Capricorn with Sag ASC. I don't think, despite her plethora of Cap planets, distance and relying on the internet was actually why they split up. I don't know the reason, but she moved down there for her masters this year and he is still there anyway.
I agree about earth not being fond of long distance relationships though.

EDIT oh mind you they knew each other in person beforehand, okay that's a rubbish example, but I'll keep it up because I was thinking about the Moon-Neptune thing. 

I think as others have said outer planets may play a role, especially planets and aspects to them that indicate intuition because I think one of the problems with online correspondence is that getting that extra information such as facial cues and intonation can make something hard to decipher...you know? I always get upset because I think someone is being cold with me but its hard to be warm over texts and messages isn't it, so I think someone would have to be very self assured and intuitive to be able to have a long term, long distance relationship.

Such subtle behavioural cues can only really be understood when face to face coz thats how we have evolved I guess, but in terms of synastry..hmm I don't know. I am unsure as to what makes an online relationship work in of itself. I always thought when meeting online you'd always hope to meet in person eventually.

I guess some very shy people may actually find introducing and opening themselves up is easier online first, so...again, like Ava and 12YearsABlob pointed out, natal stuff probably counts too as to who would actually tolerate it.

I am not one of these people really because I get confused and upset quite often, ha!

[FruityLlama]

I'm pretty much the same as you then Ava haha although now I find, as I get older how much I can't really be bothered with the texting and messaging. Its supposed to make life easier, and to some extent it does but I prefer seeing people in person because texting just annoys me. I think its the constant reading and re-reading what you've written, making sure it sounds right etc. Face to face communication is way easier because I can just laugh if I don't know what to say haha!!

Just keep smiling is my motto, you can't do that so much online haha

I mean I enjoy coming onto forums and discussing things, but I suppose its more of a group thing anyway where lots of people can pitch in with different ideas.

I guess I am a bit more chatty online too, though it depends. 

[FruityLlama]

Actually although I do stand by what I said above, I've realised that's more to do with people I see everyday. With people Ive not met in person, I don't find it bothering because there is no other way to communicate. There are some people that i speak to frequently online and I wish I could meet in real life but they are like the other side of the world so sometimes perhaps for some people they just accept whatever the situation is, yknow?

[sven555]

Jul 18, 2018 1:38:18 GMT @blindlion said:

I'm just taking a stab here.

I always consider mercury and moon. Since relationships rely a lot on both, emotions and communication. At least online but also in person. Perhaps more emphasis online. Of course not to ignore other things including asc.
I think online relationships have potential to be incredible if they work well. This assuming that a long term commitment is desired. Eventually they become difficult many times. I have quite a bit of experience with them. lol

I agree with this.

Many people I have met online that I have actually become friends with; we seem to have at least Sun/Mercury in a similar element (for me, Earth Sun/Air Mercury or Air Sun/Earth Mercury)

But those who have slowly drifted apart from have lacked any Moon aspects. My current SO and I met on a language exchange site (How Mercurian?) and both wanted to learn each other's language or at least practice it. This gave us a shared interest or goal, but after a while we became attached to each other. We speak via voice and video each day and rarely have text conversations with each other.

Fast forward to now, we are together and see each other every month by travelling. It works for now and have plans for the future. We have Moon/Mercury and Moon/ASC double; which I think helps you feel connected together.

I guess sometimes people drop off as you both have different interests and especially if you just message one another; you don't always get the same emotion as speaking/seeing.


 

[sven555]

I have to add that Uranus also had an influence on me when we met and Jupiter/Saturn affected us when we met.

These are just pointers for those interested.