Reflecting upon a significant friendship

[t5]

The chart above is for the day and place of birth of a male, who was my "wing-man" friend from the age of 13 to 23. ... During that time as a two-person-team - we had a close bond that took us through the death of his father (at age 14); college; marriage to our respective "wing-woman" partners; entering the same profession and working together in the same office for the first two years of our employment. ... Yet, although living within walking distance of each other's homes, our bond faded within a year of him moving to a new employer - during which I became conscious of/uncomfortable with some subtle attempts by him to "put me down", so made a conscious decision to allow our friendship to die naturally (rather than become toxic).

However, I have always been "uneasy" about making (and acting upon) that conscious decision ... and wonder now if the (only recently noticed by me) Mercury-Mars-Saturn-Venus focused Poleaxe in his natal chart might have been the driving force behind it.

So, with that in mind (and not knowing his actual time of birth), I have drawn his chart for a time that produces the same house cusp degrees as my own natal chart ... in the hope that this might show/support MY PERCEPTION of how his natal poleaxe might manifest. 

[t5]

Notes

1. The UT birth time used in the chart is 19:17:10 pm, giving a Moon degree of 07Taurus19 - on a day when it moved from 27Aries45 to 09Taurus41. So, any astrological indicators involving the Moon have to be ignored/not used.

2. Venus was the fastest moving planet on that day, travelling 1deg15mins. Mercury, Sun and Mars respectively travelled 1deg11mins, Ideg00mins and 0deg47mins.

3. Hence, if we ignore the Moon, the posted chart is a reliable synastry chart - showing where my friend's natal planets fall in my natal houses (and thus, how his behaviour might be perceived by me).

4. I am only 15 weeks older than him - yet, (in my natal chart) Jupiter is at 0Cap59; Saturn is at 5Virgo33; retrograde Uranus is at 29Gemini 45; Neptune is at 14Libra18 and retrograde Pluto is at 16Leo34. ... So, we march in the same direction (generational planet signs) - but to different drummers (generational planet degree locations), and tunes (personal planet sign+degree locations).

5. I have natal black-moon-lilith at 13Pisces37mins, conjunct his natal sun at 13Pisces54. So, a comparison of the Neptune-Pluto based yods formed by his sun and my lilith might reveal how we march differently. 
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[t5]

Neptune-Pluto-Sun Yod vs Neptune-Pluto-BlackMoon Yod

Both share the same Libra Neptune/Leo Pluto base ... so, part of the generation that was born to dissolve the barriers to empowerment in relationships. However, my Pluto Sabian Symbol (Leo 17) cautions against "being afraid to lift your voice. Fear of mixing in with others. Standing in the background. Continually doing for others without being paid." - whilst his (Leo 15) cautions against "blowing your trumpet. Closing off areas of one's life, overplaying others. Feeling crammed with no room." ( sabiansymbols.com/symbol-lookup/ )

This manifested as a difference in outlook ... with him believing that success is achieved by "blowing your own trumpet/serving the self", whilst I believe it comes from "quietly serving others". And, it was that difference which (ultimately) resulted in him choosing to leave our first employer (and me choosing to stay) - when the latter found himself unable to (immediately) increase our pay, after we successfully completed of the first part of our professional examinations.

But, the impact upon our friendship came later ... when that employer rewarded my loyalty by providing both the funding and time required for me to undertake a fast-track course to complete the remaining parts of the professional examinations.

[t5]

The Mercury-Mars-Saturn Poleaxe

One could easily conclude from my last post that the subsequent "put downs" of me by my friend were caused by his envy of the loyalty reward given by the employer he had chosen to leave. However, he is not the kind of person who looks back (with regret) upon his past decisions/actions - and he never expressed any regrets about this one.

Hence, I believe his "put downs" were/are a mechanism for moving-on to the next stage of his life/personal development ... enabling him to let-go of people/relationships that have "run their course"/served their purpose - which unassertive Pisces Mars, Aquarius Mercury and Virgo Saturn would otherwise be unable to do.

So, with that conclusion in mind, I recall that he used "putting down" as a mechanism for pushing away the friends he had prior to age 13 (when he and I became "wing-men") - and that he developed a new "wing-men" relationship at his second place of employment, soon after starting there. ... Thus, on reflection, my conscious decision to end our relationship before it became toxic seems to have been sound - and I now feel much better about having made it.

[Ava]

I like that transiting Mars is conjunct his poleaxe apex Saturn as you contemplate this, t5.

Transiting Mars in Virgo opposing Jupiter Rx, good time for thinking (Virgo Mars) about things of the past? (Jupiter Rx creates a focused poleaxe now for this friend. Maybe you are clarifying facts now, which would have been useful to him back then? Almost like a kind of transference.)

[t5]

Yes, Ava ... I woke up this morning wondering "why the urge to reflect NOW upon a mutual-growth relationship that ended some 49 years ago and, retrospectively, appears to have reached a point where both parties were ready/needing to move-on as individuals (rather than together/as a team?" ... And, astrologically, the current transit of Mars conjunct his Saturn (which "eases" my natal Jupiter-Uranus opposition) is probably the immediate culprit. ... However, as you know, the urge to understand how poleaxe figures manifest has been with me for more than a year now - and I suspect the 49 years of being uneasy with my conscious decision to move-on might be the real driving force of that.

But, although his professional career progress ultimately suffered as a result of him leaving/"not trusting" our first employer, it initially thrived ... and (at the time) nothing would have persuaded him to stay.